Loving Revelation: Being positive in the midst of cynicism

So when I took the StrengthsFinder 2.0 assessment a few years back, one of my top 5 strengths was Positivity…which is, of course, a no-brainer for those who know me and/or even loosely follow my posts.

And I LOVE this strength–it is the essence of my enthusiasm, my authentic ability to see the good in all people and circumstances, my sense of humor and my ability to buoy the spirits of those around me…

What’s hard about it, though, is that I also wear my heart on my sleeve, and I can feel like a big, shiny target for (what I experience as) bubble-bursting cynics. And as much as it seems like “you can’t bring this girl down,” believe me, you can. And for what good reason?

My positivity can look like naivete to folks who don’t see life through the same lens, and I get that people might be trying to save me from disappointment or from some harsh future reality through “bringing me down to earth” or inserting what they think is reality into my experience, and yet, my reality has never colored the world as harsh and I like the life I’m creating. Life only ever feels harsh when I meet people who try to convince me that I’m going to soon discover that life is harsh. And as much as they might think that they’re sparing me from some nameless bad thing in my future…It just hurts me in the here and now…and then I have to do mental and emotional backtracking to get back to what’s true FOR ME.

One of the things it says in the StrengthsFinder assessment for people who have this strength is to choose not to hang around negative or cynical people because they drain me and bring me down…which is true. And I wish it were so simple to just “not hang around them,” and the reality of life, and especially of my life in meeting all new people, right now, is that I can’t avoid them all. I just wish it didn’t make me feel hurt and icky and less somehow when I encounter people trying to give me a “dose of reality.” In all of my capacity to rise above, to not take on other people’s stuff…I’ve not mastered this one. I’m so mutable and good at trying on other’s perspectives that I can lose my sense of what feels good for me in these kinds of interactions.

And I know those people will keep coming…especially as I’ve moved to a big city where people are trying to make dreams happen, and so many people seem to have a say on the right and wrong way to do that…and all I’m left with, right now is perhaps strengthening my ability to say, “Thanks for your perspective and my experience of life has been different…and I like my view.”

I may have just arrived in NYC 2 weeks ago, but I’ve been alive for 32 years and I haven’t lived in a vacuum. So far my life experience has said that no matter where I am, I get back 10-fold what I give…and what I want exists. And that’s the world I continue to choose–whether I’m in NYC, or Bangkok, or Monona, WI.

Sorry if this seems a little ranty–just feeling a little tender and drained tonight. I welcome your perspective, dear hearts.

(And, I also invite you to notice in your own life when you might burst someone’s bubble for the sake of being right…and assess: Is it really worth it?) xo

:)Melissa

©2014 Melissa Simonson

Love Revelation: Love is all there is…

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Life has this way of loving me, of loving you
with every opportunity, every pain point,
with every struggle, every truth
Love lives in the dark places and the light
In the magic and the routine
In the order and the mess

Love IS the miracle that we seek

The clarity, the confidence
In the moments that we wonder,
am I the only one? Am I all alone?

We have only to soften, to open, to allow

We are, at any moment, in the presence of blessing,
surrounded by love. If we choose to see it,
wonder is all that’s left.

It’s all that there is.

©2014 Melissa Simonson

Love Revelation: Small Acts of Kindess

Everyday since I first set foot in Brooklyn, and sometimes multiple times a day, people are blowing me away with their spirit of friendliness and helpfulness. Momentary connections and funny commentary at the grocery store or the post office, conversations struck up at the locker room at the gym, a random man coming to find me in the coffee ordering line just to let me know there is a table with an outlet that just opened up (he saw me looking for one to no avail).

Yes, there are A LOT of people here and lots of people focused on their own stuff as we humans tend to be…and yet there is magic in the madness.

And I can say with all sincerity that these kind strangers are angels for me as I ride the emotional roller-coaster of familiarity and homesickness multiple times a day.

Small acts of kindness make a HUGE difference. We each have the capacity to make a loving impact on the people around us…in such very simple and yet utterly profound ways. 

:)Melissa

©2014 Melissa Simonson

Love Revelation: Listening for “home”

It is a weird and uncomfortable experience to not have a clear sense of “home.” Today marks my 2nd full day in Brooklyn and Yesterday’s big accomplishments included finding a local grocery that I like so that I could actually have food at home, picking up odds and ends for daily living…I’m of course, already noticing the things that I forgot to bring, the items that I had no idea would be essential in this new space. And, oh, I didn’t get lost yesterday, which was cool. 

The emotional experience, right now is one of total ungroundedness, searching for center, for the SENSE of home. I find it and create it in little moments and then it’s gone again, to then, rediscover it in another moment. Lavender essential oil filling my room, time spent with my journal, watching a favorite TV show online and reading before bed, nourishing food, my favorite lotion, creating order in my new space. There is a deep need to find and create the familiar within this completely unfamiliar place. I feel invisible and disconnected from who I am, what matters to me, what I want, what I need. And yet, the preciousness of this time is that I get to rediscover and perhaps discover for the first time, the answer to these essential questions.

My main inspiration, right now, lies in creating and relishing in beauty. Nourishing my body with movement and good food. Making my space pretty. Creating a sense of grounded spaciousness with lovely smells. Creating softness and lightness in my experience.

There are powerful fears lurking beneath the surface that I’ll get stuck and consumed by a mode of survival, that I will lose sight of who I am, that I’ll forget and disappear somehow, that I won’t accomplish what matters to me in my heart…and my inner Wise Woman is smiling at me as she reminds me I’ve only been here for 2 days. Now is not the time to climb mountains, it is time to rest in the valley, to gather up strength, to listen within for what is “home” and then to lean into those experiences with all of my heart. That sense of home will guide me, will pull to exactly who, what and where I need to be.

And so I honor my fear for not letting me forget that I am a leader feeling called to accomplish big, loving things in the months and years ahead. And for now, I bring myself back to the here and now, I meet myself with gentleness and patience and ease, and I listen and follow the voice of home that lives in my belly and my bones.

And as I write these words while listening deeply to my inner landscape, I hear a soft whisper telling me that magic awaits, and I am smiling, tears glistening in my eyes.

xo Melissa

P.S. Feel inspired to support my soul journey to NYC while claiming AMAZING rewards–like the opportunity to be supported by me through your own transformation at kickass discount prices? Visit: http://www.gofundme.com/MelissaNYCJourney to learn more!

©2014 Melissa Simonson

Video: All the pieces of who we are…

I made this video for you today, Beautiful People. If you find yourself in the midst of transition, in pursuit of dreams or wanting to pursue them, coping with loss in its various forms or afraid to make changes and big leaps in your life, I encourage you to check this out. As it turns out…we don’t actually lose the people and things and places that matter to us when we transition and we have everything to gain by making our big leaps.
Here is the link to the GoFundMe Campaign: http://www.gofundme.com/MelissaNYCJourney  (where you can receive the Soul Mapping Journey for 50% off!)

<3 Melissa

©2014 Melissa Simonson